Puntastically Punnerific

Okay it’s the afternoon and, if you’re reading Beck’s Cafe you are officially goofing off.  Or, maybe you’re just giving your brain a break and, studies do show, that an internet brain breaks DO in fact improve your performance at work.  So, in some sense, Beck’s Cafe is in evil league with your employer to get you to output MORE.  Ghastly!

So, here, on a Monday, is some fun to give your brain a break!

• A teacher was asking her class: “What is the difference between ‘unlawful’ and ‘illegal’?” Only one hand shot up. “Ok, answer, Joan,” said the teacher. “‘Unlawful’ is when u do something the law doesn’t allow and ‘Illegal’ is a sick eagle.”

• Sign behind an Amish carriage: “Energy efficient vehicle. Runs on grass and oats. CAUTION: Avoid exhaust!”

• An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.

• A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. “But why,” they asked, as they moved off. “Because”, he said, “I can’t stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer.”

• A hungry traveller stops at a monastery and is taken to the kitchens. A brother is frying chips. ‘Are you the friar?’ he asks. ‘No. I’m the chip monk,’ he replies

• She was the apple of his eye and he liked to sit down be cider.

• If a judge loves the sound of his own voice, expect a long sentence.

Puntastically fun jokes and puns sourced from, Pun of the Day, The Good Clean Funnies List, Best Clean Humor on the Net