Comments on: What would you change for love? http://beckscafe.com/2006/09/27/what-would-you-change-for-love/ Coffee, Chocolate & Love Sat, 11 Feb 2012 14:36:42 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.com/ By: Rebecca http://beckscafe.com/2006/09/27/what-would-you-change-for-love/#comment-71 Fri, 29 Sep 2006 22:13:48 +0000 http://sun.asmallorange.com/~becki/2006/09/27/what-would-you-change-for-love/#comment-71 Hi Nikki,

Thank you for your very thoughtful and detailed comment. There’s alot to think about in your comment and I’m glad you left it.

I’m not sure I’d dissect it like that. I think I’d just chalk it up to love. Maybe I’m just a romantic at heart but, what she did for her partner was really sacrificial love. And it wasn’t forever, it was only for a time, which likely made it more doable I’d reckon.

But your last sentance maybe sums it:

So I guess, I have not known the love that Laura has or if I am a moral enough a person to willingly throw my life into such an incredible reversal and play girl/boy much the same way as I played boy/girl for half a lifetime.

I don’t know anyone who has experienced that kind of love. I know of some who, to me, it appears have, but whether they have or not I’m not sure. Perhaps only time will tell?

Thank you again Nikki,

Becki

]]> By: Nikki http://beckscafe.com/2006/09/27/what-would-you-change-for-love/#comment-70 Fri, 29 Sep 2006 01:03:02 +0000 http://sun.asmallorange.com/~becki/2006/09/27/what-would-you-change-for-love/#comment-70 Dear Becki:
This is presenting an incredibly tough question.
There is absolutely no comparison to something as simple as pawning ones watch when it comes to something you have emotionally struggled with your entire life.
Obviously at 60, Laura’s wife went through the years of questions and psychological profiling that brought Laura to confirming her identity as a woman. That is one heck of alot of love we’re talking about here. Like so many of us know, being gender disphoric turns hard the tides of love.
If someone was to stand by me a life span of transitioning, being there through those embarrassing first steps out in the light of day as a cross dresser, still loving me as the hormonal changes chemically castrated me and removed a major portion of our physical love making and then litterly became a lesbian to stay side by side and continue to show eternal love, then WHAT would I do?????
I guess we have just reached the difference between being ethical and moral. The ethical person questions right or wrong the moral person knows what is right and just does it.
Are you strong enough to be moralistic.
I think this question has to be confronted by each individual couple and I have not met one yet who has gone through 40 years of marriage with daddy wearing mommies underwear.
Many try, many find some sexual excitment at the very beining and this is normal. Some manage to stay together through the weekend outings and deeper emergance into transition but there is a breaking point.
Me personally have gone through several relationships but none ever knew “Nikki” and some who now know want little or nothing to do with me.
So I guess, I have not known the love that Laura has or if I am a moral enough a person to willingly throw my life into such an incredible reversal and play girl/boy much the same way as I played boy/girl for half a lifetime.
Love — Nikki

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